


Empyrean

by najaeri



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Angel/Demon Relationship, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drama, Fallen Angels, Fantasy, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-22
Updated: 2020-03-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:27:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23263936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/najaeri/pseuds/najaeri
Summary: Jaejoong learned everything that came with being an angel from his superior, Yunho. But then, his inspiration fell and the angel swore to make him regret his decision... Until he committed the same mistake himself.
Relationships: Jung Yunho & Kim Jaejoong, Jung Yunho/Kim Jaejoong, Kim Jaejoong & Jung Yunho
Kudos: 10





	Empyrean

Everyone admired him; his eternal spirit. He was a general in the highest hierarchy from the Second Sphere and he was only months away from being advanced into the First Sphere. Not everyone got there and not everybody deserved it. But he did. He was more than perfect - he was an entity that couldn’t be converted into prose. He was out of this world.

Just like all of them - but deeper. Stronger.

The spirit fighter that was thinking of said general saw a figure flying towards him; saw the biggest wings covered with the most sparkling lights his heavenly eyes had ever seen.

“Yes?” he asked, being as respectful as he could. He was in the highest title of the Third Sphere, but there was still so much to learn. He watched his superiors with a giddy smile, wanting to grow and follow them. He was not ambitious, he did not feel envy or hatred like humans. He only felt love.

Pure love.

“I have great news for you,” advised the Lordship. “You will be entering the Second Sphere soon. I will personally teach you how to cast evil spirits away when a priest, pastor or human are in ceremony. You will also have your armor.”

“Really?” he responded, his wings flapping in bliss. “Wow… I mean… It is such an honor…”

“I will be moving forward as well,” he announced, watching the ruler agitating his wings in excitement. “I will be carrying the wheels of the chair. Can you believe it?”

The princedom smiled, joyful at the news. “You deserve that and more.”

“Everybody deserves to be greater, except Him, because he already is the Greatest,” and the smaller angel nodded.

He was right.

Their Server was the ultimate definition of authority and respect. The lightest of all lights. The Untouchable.

“Well, it will be your turn soon and we already chose the people who will advance after you,” was his latest news and the princedom nodded, following the Lordship closely.

He was more than ready.

But as gleams passed, he couldn’t see his commander. He learned a lot from him, but it felt...indescribable. Like angels, they were not allowed to have emotions like the humans they protected and the humans they answered prayers too. They were entities without forms solely created to be followers and bring protection to those who wanted it; those who needed it.

As they reached their destination, he saw how beams of lights covered the entire skies and those whose presence was needed, were placed in a room of pureness. He was in the seventh row as a princedom, but he was the head of the Third Sphere, his promotion due in a couple of days.

He focused on the news, knowing that the highest of the Angels, the heavenly servants of Him, would be speaking.

“We lost a high-ranking Lordship,” one of them announced. The wings covered everything, they could only listen to their voice, but that changed as they stepped on the heavenly stairs. He was due to be a Power soon and he would be able to, at least, see their eyes.

“He sinned,” she began to say, her angelic voice covering the skies. “And we have to say this is a first in a while. No such ranking officer has committed as great a sin since the Fall,” she said, continuing shortly after. “A Lordship, whom we called Yunho, has gone into the arms of Hell.”

The princedom froze.

His general was a fallen angel?

He stood there for a while, not hearing anymore. He was not supposed to feel, but what was this emotion? Why did he feel the same feeling he heard humans describe when they were praying and crying? Why was everything not making sense to him?

The Lordship was two gleams of light away from becoming a wheel. He was about to carry the chair of the Greatest. How could he betray them? How could he disobey the laws?

He felt two entities beside him and he knew exactly why. They did not feel, but they knew. After all, they guided souls and guarded their prayers to bring them, discuss them and try to make their requested miracles happen. They knew what emotions were. They knew what made them so miserable at times. They knew everything.

“You will continue your training,” said one of the angels, guiding the princedom to another room. “But due to unforeseen circumstances, you’ll be given the title today.”

“O-okay,” was all he could say as he entered the podium and felt the divine surrounding him. There were rays of light everywhere, his armor-plated in gold with touches of silver. It was designed for him from head to toe. He closed his eyes, feeling thunderbolts creating a storm on his insides.

And then his wings felt lighter, allowing him to float in a heartbeat.

He smiled to himself, for the first time in his eternal life having thoughts he never thought he would have.

_‘I'll find you, Yunho… And I will make you regret betraying the Heavens.’_

+++

Yunho sighed. All of this felt so different from Heaven. He wasn’t proud of being hereafter being one of the highest angels, but there was nothing he could do. He had never been aware of time before, but he knew a lot of it had passed since he came here.

He has been collecting souls ever since.

He was at the top of the Second hierarchy. Pretty much like angels in the Heavens, demons had their positions, but far more complicated. It took him quite a bit to understand entirely how the reign worked, but he was smart. After all, he hadn’t been a high-ranked angel for anything. He knew how to obey the rules and he knew what to do and what not to do.

But everyone started from zero, which was obvious. Everyone was a fallen angel and went to what he had to describe as purgatory. Every single fallen angel was there because of committed sin, or disobedience had occurred, and they needed to be stripped from their former lives. They were inducted into the tumultuous world of feelings -the cloud that all humans lived in- to understand these souls.

A big difference from the Heavens.

They were not allowed to understand them. They were only allowed to watch them, made sure everything happened according to the rules and protected them from harm. This changed as they stepped forward, the Third Sphere overseeing this particularly. As the Ruler of the Second Sphere, he was a vigilante; in charge of meticulously supervising the roles of the lower-ranked angels. When he was close to stepping in the highest sphere, the only thing he was going to do was to guard the Throne and present the prayers of men and women to Him.

He never thought Hell was going to be like this.

It was extremely difficult to adapt at first, being so docile and well behaved as he was. It was hard to collect souls and bring them to inhabit hell. That was everyone’s main goal. They usually had the worst of the worst, but they also had people who, unfortunately, had cowered in despair. He also thought that people who committed suicide would automatically come here, but most of them went to exist in Limbo, the division between Heaven and Hell.

There, a reunion with a high-ranked angel and a high-ranked fallen angel took place divided by an invisible wall. They could feel each other, each knew the other was there and even if they wanted to cross to the other side, it wasn’t allowed to. It also irradiated them what expected them on the other side; extreme brightness for demons and extreme darkness for angels. The high-ranked demon was allowed to decide on behalf of Lucifer, but the high-ranked angel needed to consult the Heavens first. Most of the time, it took more on Heavens’ side to decide than on their side, but it was the rules.

It was… strange, but he had gotten used to it. He was not high-ranked enough to present an angel but also, he wasn’t allowed to because of his former rank. If he ever reached the First hierarchy, someone would need to go on his behalf.

“Hey,” he heard someone say, his thoughts flying away. The demon turned around, seeing his Hell companion Kana.

Another difference was that demons were in pairs no matter what. They were given body shells to distinguish themselves on Earth and with other angels, but they were simply dark shadows in their homes. They did not have a form, every demon was equal in that sense except for Lucifer. He retained his form from when he was kicked out from Heaven.

Or that’s what he said. He has never seen him.

“Hey,” he responded to the female demon. “Is it time?”

“Yup,” she replied back, reciting the names of the people’s souls that they needed to take. As high-ranked, they didn’t need to do it as much as the lower fallen angels, but it was still a requirement. The demon mostly liked to do it as deals and he was a hundred percent successful. Most of the souls inhabiting this place were either tricked or naturally evil. He was quite soft still and he despised having to deal with the souls of murderers, pedophiles, and people who committed capital sins, but that’s why demons had their own companion. They had the right to feel remorse and hate to those they didn’t like; no limitations.

Kana, on the other hand, loved to torture them. She was no dealmaker. She took their souls without warning and harrowed them to no end. They were treated as slaves, having to do whatever they wanted them to do. Some souls did become a part of the rulers’ hierarchy and it happened often, but not all of them met the expectations required to become one.

“So, there are six souls in total for you to bargain with,” she began to explain, knowing he was taking mental notes about the names. “It seems that one is entirely pure and the other five are kind of mixed.”

“Pure?” he asked, quite surprised to be honest. He did not deal with pure souls, there was another demon that dealt exclusively with those. It was always a fight because those souls are supposed to go to the Heavens but mistakes happen. They are usually not notified of these souls either.

“Yeah,” she said, explaining further. “From what they told me, his partner’s soul is mixed. Since you like making deals, we might get that soul at once instead of waiting for that one to die.”

“But still,” he replied, completely taken aback at the news. “Something happened, right?”

“He was not supposed to die,” she responded as the demon’s thoughts started to make sense. “There’s no accidental death, you know that,” she continued. “When it’s your time, it is. You were supposed to be there to meet your fate. However, with this particular soul, the shell that was involved overslept and he, instead of following instructions to stay at his house, went out to buy some groceries with his partner. There was a mass murder in the Kija Supermarket.”

“That’s why we are extremely busy today,” he whispered. “I have sensed demons coming back and forth.”

“Mhmm,” was her response. “They are still counting up there, but we already know the exact amount. A hundred people died. The murderer placed bombs strategically in aisles and the cashiers’ lane. He was an employee there and wanted to get back at headquarters. You know, the usual.”

“I guess you have around 3 souls, right?” he asked. His companion collected fewer souls than others, but she had the most wicked ones on her charge.

“Yup,” he could sense her smiling. “I have the murderer’s, a child molester and a former rapist. They were in the grocery shop when it happened. Such a pity.”

“Such sarcasm,” he replied. “But I guess we need to move quickly before one of the angels notices that I am there to make a deal.”

“Yup,” was her reply, knowing that in a whoosh they were inside the grocery store. They had their usual shells, dressed in black. The female demon had long purple hair to her waist with bangs, a scaled skirt with high-heel boots, a tank top, and a leather jacket. The male demon was in an all-black tuxedo. He saw some of his co-workers there as well, wearing clothes similar to his.

“After all, every soul is assigned to a specific angel. If the angel does not appear or it’s too late, we can do something about it. Therefore, we need to do our job as soon as possible and prevent the deal from breaking,” were her words and the demon smiled. She was right.

They were complete opposites. They could take as many souls as they wanted to, but angels from the highest Second sphere to the lowest-ranked from the First sphere, were entitled to come when a massacre is in place as only one soul can be taken from each body. When an angel is late for whatever reason, he could make a deal.

He has never failed, neither did he intended to.

Talking about his ex-peers, he also noticed the presence of some angels, but they couldn’t see each other.

They weren’t allowed to.

It was chaotic.

People were running, bleeding and crying, smoke that smelled of black powder mixed with metal surrounded the place. The first responders had white masks and protection lenses to protect themselves from the dangerous air. There were tons of reporters and people screaming for their loved ones outside. The sirens and radios along with the screaming invaded the grocery market.

A very depressing scene.

“Yunho?” he heard her calling him. He directly looked at her. “There’s your soul,” she pointed out and he almost hissed.

That guy’s soul was indeed pure. He was not used to those anymore, but he needed to complete a deal.

He watched the partner’s soul coming at him. It seems that he went through the yellow lines and ignored the warnings of those guarding the scene. They couldn’t stop him and neither were they going to. They had lived to save and wounds to attend. They would focus on them later.

And just like his partner said, his soul was mixed. Not every single person that had a mixed soul was a bad person, they just debated a lot with good and evil. There was nothing wrong with that. As sinners, most souls decided at the very end or were forgiven seconds before reaching their final destination.

Also, not everyone went to Hell or Heaven. Some reincarnated. Souls were bound to learn from their mistakes, but the problem lays when those errors are continuously repeated. That’s when you get damned.

After all, it was your own choice.

Yunho listened to the partner’s screams and heartbreaking sobs. He wanted him to come back, he was screaming at the almost lifeless body to not give up, but he was talking to an empty shell.

The demon put a hand on the broken man’s shoulder. He was not visible to him and he would never be unless he wanted. Currently, a sorrowful mind was the easiest to manipulate and he struck.

“I can bring him back,” Yunho began to say, the partner’s sobs turning silent. “All I need is your soul as a compromise.”

“H-huh?” was all he could say. He was sure he heard another voice, but there was no one around him. It was a goddamned mess already. Why would anyone want to say that so recklessly?

“In exchange of his life, when you die, I want you to come with me,” continued Yunho. He never mentioned Hell. People get legit scared of it, but to be honest, it wasn’t anything too disturbing. It was a normal place to live. The only difference was that you had tasks to comply with. Nothing too strenuous.

“W-who are you?!” he shouted, the tears falling once again.

“I am someone who can save your lover,” he insisted while he smiled. The guy’s soul was becoming darker, meaning he was contemplating his offer.

“Yoochun, don’t!” Yunho heard someone say and he muttered a ‘fuck’. That meant an angel came to his rescue but he couldn’t help to contain his chuckle.

But that voice sounded extremely familiar.

The semi-lifeless guy’s soul became mixed, disappearing all of the sudden.

“Promise me your soul and I will rescue him,” Yunho said, watching how the guy’s desperately called for the body he had on his arms. He wasn’t dead; technically speaking. But that’s something the sorrowful soul did not know.

However, the soul became lighter as the first responders took the lifeless body and the companion away.

Yunho sighed. It was the first time a deal did not go through, but he was determined. He would go to Limbo, save that soul and have the other in return. He would not return to his home until he achieved his goal.

But for now, he would collect other souls and give them to Kana. After that, he would leave for Limbo.

Which wasn’t as scary as most people thought.

+++

"You were late," they reprimanded him and he stood quietly in front of the judges. He had nothing to say and no justification. They were right and he was wrong.

"May I speak?" he asked and was given permission.

"I can rescue him," he said, determined to do such. "It was my mistake for letting him go and not being aware. It was my mistake from not being there on time, but I can get him back. The demon that was supposed to make a deal with the partner wasn't successful."

"Is the soul in Limbo?" one of the representatives asked, receiving nods from everyone including the angel in question.

"I have the armor and the courage," stated the angel, kneeling to his superiors. "Allow me to redeem myself and have the soul back."

"We believe in your judgment, Jaejoong," they said and he smiled. He liked his given name.

"We also know you are strong enough to keep your faith as Limbo is a difficult place," they continued, giving him their blessings. "But also, understand that your old master will be there and you need to obey. Please, leave."

And so he did.

But as the doors closed, one of the superiors sighed, knowing it was fated.

"He is going to fail," she said to those around her. "He is not going to make it."

+++

Jaejoong stood frozen in place. He knew he was going to encounter him here, they prepared him with that knowledge before he was permitted to enter this scary place, but he didn't know it was going to be this soon.

"Well..." he heard the demon say, smirk in place. "Who do we have here?"

The angel was trying his best to keep his composure. He couldn’t do things of his own free will. He needed to follow the rules and that meant to not engage with Yunho. He needed to ignore him but at the same time, try to focus on his main goal. That soul was his responsibility ever since it was born. He was late and he acknowledged his mistake, but when a demon is involved it certainly became difficult.

Even more when that demon was his own teacher.

"This is going to be exciting," said Yunho, his shadow moving near Jaejoong. He was in his human shell. There was no way the other could see him directly if he was in his usual form. Also, being in Limbo didn't allow that either. They were not allowed to use their usual powers, they were there as entities in search of an unusual soul.

It wasn't something big for Yunho, but it was for Jaejoong. He was not used to shades of grey or darkness; all he saw was eternal light.

"I am here to do my job," was Jaejoong's response, walking on top of the rocky path. He knew flying was not allowed and neither could he use his praying powers. All he could do was act pretty much like those humans his subordinates protected until he found the soul he was looking for.

"So am I," responded Yunho, walking behind him. He smiled, his wings flapping but not enough to exert flight. "But I never thought he was your responsibility."

"Yes," he responded softly, trying to concentrate on feeling the soul. There were plenty of them here screaming for help. It was going to be incredibly difficult to find the one he wanted when he was so limited. It was easier on Earth.

And the demon’s chit-chat was distracting him.

"I guess your voice is the one I heard trying to stop me," he replied, the half-smile never leaving his face. He was one hundred percent sure that Jaejoong was the one there. But why was he so late? That soul was supposed to leave with him, but due to his mistake, it went between life and death and hence, him trying to make a deal with the partner.

But he wasn't quick enough.

And now, that soul was lost.

"Would you kindly stop talking to me?" he said, turning his body towards the annoying demon. He wanted to do his work in peace and he wasn't helping at all.

"Nope," admitted the demon, following each of his steps.

"Why?" he asked, an invisible barrier between both of them. They were not allowed to touch each other in any sense of the matter. Even in Limbo, it was restricted. Demons and angels were enemies and they had their own purpose. They couldn't mix.

"Because it's fun," answered Yunho, their eyes connecting for the first time in millenniums.

"I am not here to do… that," replied Jaejoong, not sure what that word meant, but knowing it was something humans said and felt often.

Unlike demons, he wasn't supposed to feel anything apart from love.

"I am well aware of that," responded the demon, entertained by the angel. "But it doesn't matter. I want that soul too. I made a deal and I am here to complete it."

"The deal you speak of never took place," said the angel, sighing afterward before turning once again and continue his path. "He never accepted."

"But he will," answered the demon, following the angel once again. "And when he does, I might have that soul as well. 2 for the price of 1. Isn't that exciting?"

"No," was Jaejoong's response, clearly uncomfortable at the sight of the other souls. They were not allowed to see them. They either saw sparkles of light or a shadowy cast. That was the only way a lost or confused soul could determine who was visiting the forgotten place.

"You won't win this time, Jaejoong," he called his name, making the other halt his steps completely. "I won't let you."

"You have never won," was his answer, his own hands intertwined. "You lost."

"That's what they want you to think," replied the demon, his eyes focused on the other's wings. "I actually gained a lot. More than you thought."

"How could you have gained something in Hell?" he answered with another question, feeling empathy for him. "Hell is the worst of the worst. It is deemed to allocate sins and never-ending suffering. There is nothing good about Hell."

"There is nothing good about Heaven either," said Yunho while earning a gasp from Jaejoong. "Authorities are selfish. You are technically a slave in every shape and form. How is that living?"

"We are not living entities, demon," he replied back, refusing to call him by his former given name. "We have always been spirits without shape or form. The shells we have or in your case, had, like angels, it's because it is easier for people to recognize us when it's their time to go. Nothing more."

"But weren't you created to love?" asked the demon with a smirk. "To love a human you must feel what they feel and yet, you can't. You lack the basics of understanding."

"We love them because they were created in His' resemblance and they have free will to choose. We cannot judge them by their actions. Only He does," he continued, not sure why he was engaging with the demon. But Jaejoong still found it hard to believe that he had already forgotten everything he was taught.

But again, he was no longer an angel.

Jaejoong sighed, interrupting Yunho's words before they even began. "I am not here to discuss anything with you, demon. I am here to rescue a soul that was my responsibility, to begin with. That's all," the angel increased his steps until he felt the demon be far enough from him.

Yunho simply smiled, deciding to leave him alone for now.

+++

Jaejoong knew it has been quite some time already. He was never aware of how much time has passed, but he was weary. He did not feel any thirst or hunger, but the ambiance was tenue. It was sucking his light little by little. It was something he had expected, but not to this extent. Junsu's soul was hiding quite well and that made his search all the more difficult.

He needed to find him soon.

"Are you ever going to stop following me?" he asked, knowing that Yunho's shadow was near, but not enough.

He felt every inch of the demon and it irritated him. There, he said it. A feeling he was not supposed to feel was enveloping him completely and he didn't know how to process this. He would surely be judged after his quest was done, but there was nothing he could do. Jaejoong had one plan and he needed to complete it.

No questions asked.

"Nope," responded the demon, clearly entertained by the angel's presence. He was not as limited as Jaejoong on his quest, but he certainly had restrictions as well. And he couldn't help but admit he liked seeing him once again.

"You are not as restricted as me," began to say the angel, stopping for a bit to look at his surroundings. He was looking for any clue that could lead him to Junsu's soul. "Why are you doing this?"

"You want to know?" he replied with another question, but he knew the other would not answer.

Jaejoong remained in silence, the thoughts that wanted to invade his being leaving as soon as they entered. He had complete and total power of his divinity. He wasn't going to succumb that easily. He respected and went accordingly to his will; no one else's.

"I am sure you hated me the day they announced my fall," announced Yunho. He was sure he had the angel's attention, but he was not the type of entity to fall into his words that quickly.

"I don't hate you," replied Jaejoong and Yunho noticed the sincerity. After all, angels couldn't lie. "I don't feel that kind of emotion towards anyone."

"You can," was Yunho's answer. "But you can always hide it."

"Maybe I did," were his words without any admittance. Doing such could cost him more. "Are you happy?" was his reply, turning around to see Yunho's shell in front of him, but far enough to contemplate the demon.

"No," he admitted without hesitation, his steps coming closer. Jaejoong just looked at him without any emotion, knowing he wouldn't be able to come closer. "I am not."

"Then, why did you leave?" he asked. It was a question that has been surrounding his soul ever since he was given the news. He has tried very hard not to ask and not to arouse suspicion, but the question never left him alone. He thought he would never get an answer, but here he was, in front of his old teacher trying to understand the decision that turned him into a fallen angel.

"Just like most of us, I sinned," he answered, his steps halting in front of the invisible wall between them. "It was consuming me and I could not hide it anymore. They gave me countless chances, but it wasn't enough."

"You were a high ranked angel," said Jaejoong. His words were not making any sense to him. "You knew the rules and procedures. From everyone in the Heavens… how could _you_ have fallen?"

Yunho smiled sadly, the tears forming on his eyes. He hated talking about it and hated his reaction when he was made to remember. Once was when he was brought to judgment and the second when he was in front of one of Lucifer's guardians. Ever since then, he hid his most excruciating pain inside him.

"That is something you will never know," were his words. Jaejoong seemed clearly disturbed at the sight. Yunho's face was identical to humans when they were about to sin or when they held a dear secret. The difference was that they knew when they were.

With demons, he didn't possess that ability and it annoyed him.

He wanted to know!

"Why?" Jaejoong asked him. He knew he was not supposed to, but he felt the need to. He wanted to clear his mind.

But Yunho didn't respond. Instead, the demon was too close to him and he didn't notice it until he could feel his breath.

Something he wasn't supposed to.

The angel took three steps forward instead of backward and touched the invisible wall, falling to the floor at the flash of darkness that blinded him completely. Jaejoong gasped, the demon's figure disappearing in sight, leaving him completely confused.

And he failed to notice that a feather from his wings fell to the ground… a flash of light leaving with them.

+++

His trip has been silent, which he thought he would appreciate but he did not. The dimming of his light intensified, but he knew he was closer. He just had an instinct that was telling him to simply move forward. He tried to ignore the unknown -which he called feelings- that surrounded him. He wasn't here to discover new things, he needed to complete his mission.

Jaejoong sighed for the tenth time when his steps came to a stop.

He saw some shadows, but they were not familiar. They also did not transform into a human shell, but rather stayed in their original form.

That only meant that the demon knew his presence but wasn't allowed to see his. That was kind of common in the Limbo.

But with that thought came another…

How come Yunho could see him and he could see him completely as well?

The shadows simply floated around him, but he was well aware they couldn't touch him or come near him. They might be able to do it with less ranked angels, but he was a warrior. It was extremely dangerous and they knew it. They weren't fools.

And as soon as they came, they left.

Jaejoong arched an eyebrow. That was incredibly weird. He was sure there was the reason behind it, but there was no point in asking. It wasn't his job to do.

"You look bored," he heard the demon he knew quite well say and the angel couldn't help but smile. "It seems you enjoy my company. Did you miss me?"

"No," answered Jaejoong, knowing it was a blatant lie. He knew he has broken a few rules, but he would receive his punishment accordingly. Everything would be worth it when he recovers Junsu's soul and brings it to the light.

"I did miss you," admitted the demon, not wanting to move forward. He clearly remembered how the Heavens' worked and he was pretty sure that Jaejoong was awaiting some kind of judgment once he cleared his mission.

That is... if he allows him to.

“Where did you go?” inquired the angel. He wanted to avoid asking that question, but he knew he had to. He wouldn’t rest until he got that question out of his chest.

“Somewhere,” answered the demon in a purposefully vague tone. Yunho was not going to give information that easily. But he was grateful for Jaejoong being that worried about him.

He would remember it for eternity.

“I don’t know why I even bother…” muttered Jaejoong, looking upfront. “Where is he?” this time, he said it out loud for the other to hear.

“He’s nearby,” he answered, knowing the angel felt it as well.

“Are you really condemning him?” he asked, this time concerned about the soul. He knew that it would be quite a fight where only one winner would prevail. He hoped it was him, but demons had something he lacked.

Malice.

He couldn’t convince people to follow him, he was just a guiding light. Demons, however, could persuade and coerce until they received their due response. It was unfair, but at the same time, it was their nature. Angels followed rules and prevailed. Demons knew all the tricks in the book.

And Jaejoong suddenly felt envy.

The angel bit his lips, knowing this went beyond his entity. He closed his eyes in pain, not noticing another feather falling from his wings.

But Yunho noticed.

The demon suddenly stopped, his eyes growing wide in alarm at the sight.

Jaejoong was losing his feathers!

“Jaejoong,” he called his name again, making the other halt his steps. “You…” he tried to say, but he was completely taken aback.

He was horrified.

When an angel began to lose feathers, it only meant one thing; emotions. Angels were supposed to feel only pure love with those around them and with humans. They were strictly forbidden to succumb to the seven deadly sins. Failing to do so, would have their wings removed and two options were given: either become a fallen angel or disappear into thin air.

He absolutely did not want Jaejoong to go through the same pain he did.

“Your feathers…” he finished, knowing he needed to think quickly. “What are you feeling right now?”

“I… don’t know…” he replied, completely confused at the question but aware that he was sincere.

He didn’t know what was happening to him.

Maybe being in Limbo was too much for his light. Perhaps it was a bad idea to come after all. He should have taken the punishment right there instead of coming here. It was his idea and he never thought it was going to be this bad.

He just wanted to complete a good deed.

“Jaejoong, it’s bad,” tried to reason the demon with him. “Please, try to purge yourself. Don’t let any kind of emotion get to you.”

“You don’t want me to become like you, right?” said Jaejoong, hissing in pain once again. He knew it involved his wings, but he could have not imagined it was his feathers. Every time he felt something new, a feather fell.

He wanted it to stop.

“No,” admitted Yunho, trying to run to the other but he knew the wall wouldn’t permit him. “I don’t want you to come. I want you to stay.”

“Why?” he asked, trying to brace himself. The pain was too much for him to take. It was consuming every single inch of his soul and the only thing he could see was a tiny light at the end.

“Because I became like this for you!” he shouted as Jaejoong’s knees buckled to the rocky floor, sparkles of lights leaving his body. “I wanted you to remain pure! I sacrificed myself, damn it, Jaejoong! Don’t!”

But the angel could not listen anymore, the light engulfed him completely.

+++

Jaejoong slowly opened his eyes. He thought he was back home but he was surrounded by grey. He moved his head a few times until the area became clear for him and he sighed in relief.

He was still in Limbo.

“Your soul purged itself,” said the demon with surrounding tranquility. “I never knew angels could do it in Limbo.”

“It seems like it,” was his response, inchmeal standing up. “You stopped your search?”

“No,” replied Yunho with a smirk. “Your entity carried your shell here…” he responded, signaling towards the soul.

Jaejoong gasped.

“This is your fault!” exclaimed Jaejoong, horrified at the sight. Junsu’s soul was completely lost, not knowing where to go or what to do. He looked extremely distraught.

But for Yunho, it was completely different. The scenario was extremely normal. This happened to people who have not accepted death or are hanging between life and death. It was a space created for people who wanted to come back or thought they were not ready for either Heaven or Hell; a process called reincarnation.

The demon only came because he needed a deal. He came looking for Junsu’s soul to make it his no matter what. But he also came because he knew Jaejoong was going to be here. He knew the angel was not aware of his existence, but he was informed shortly before coming.

Habits are hard to break and when you are a demon, breaking the rules it’s not punishable but desirable. He could do whatever he wanted, no limitations, something he could never imagine in Heaven. But again, who would? No one. You only obeyed, you never disobeyed.

But he did.

“How come it is my fault?” responded Yunho after breaking his thoughts. “I have nothing to do with this.”

“If you hadn’t approached Yoochun, his poor soul would have come to Heaven already!” shouted back the angel, his wings flapping in despair. He tried to run towards Junsu, but he couldn’t.

He was still weak from the purification.

However, Yunho passed him with ease, reaching the other’s soul in a heartbeat.

“What?!” he exclaimed in disbelief, watching the demon turning around with a smirk.

“You forget that you are an angel,” began Yunho, directly looking at his eyes. “His soul is not pure, Jaejoong and you are not a guardian angel. You cannot approach him. You are divinity and you just purified yourself."

“But he’s my responsibility!” answered back the angel, acknowledging that his hands were completely tied in this situation. He came all from Heaven to find this soul to prevent judgment and yet, he couldn’t get near him? What kind of nonsense was this?

“He is,” replied the demon. “But you have to taint yourself. Are you willing to do it, Jaejoong?”

The angel froze.

Taint?

Angels couldn’t taint themselves, only guardian angels could because of the nature of their job. Everyone else was pure entities, made of light and at Heavens’ will. If he even tried to do it, he would get into endless problems and he had enough already. They were supposed to help, but nothing more. They were prohibited to do many things for humans or souls.

And this was one of them.

“Who are you?” heard the angel from the helpless soul.

“A demon,” answered Yunho without hesitation. Junsu’s soul was not going to remember this conversation and he wasn’t going to get scared either. Souls knew who they were and what they did. They have passed through this process countless times, but some needed a refresher.

“So, I am either in Limbo or in Hell,” he answered, looking at his surroundings. “But I guess it is Limbo. Did they do something to it?”

“We re-modeled it,” said Yunho rolling his eyes. His soul was new to a lot of things. He hated the ignorance they portrayed, but he wasn’t here to discuss it.

“I came for you,” he admitted, but he knew that no matter how foolish the soul was, they always asked for the same thing.

“And an angel too,” responded Junsu with a smile on his face, walking towards Jaejoong this time. “It’s always the same. When a soul reaches the ultimate fate, it is up to the angel, or the demon. That hasn’t changed.”

“You have only reincarnated five times,” stated the demon, arching his eyebrow while following the soul. “You are still too new to choose from.”

“Which means my shell is between life and death,” answered the reckless soul, stopping in front of the angel. “I can always go back.”

“You know that’s difficult,” replied Yunho, standing behind Junsu. “You have spent quite some time here.”

“No, it’s not difficult,” interfered Jaejoong, smiling to the soul. “You can always come back. It’s never impossible if you truly wish for it.”

“I don’t want Yoochun’s soul to be in the middle of this,” he said followed by a sigh, looking this time at Yunho. “Why did you try to make that deal with him? He has been on Earth for a long time. Are you going to make him end his final days here?”

“Everyone thinks Hell is the worst thing in the world when it isn’t,” answered the demon. “Hell is an ensemble of fallen angels who try to make humans enjoy and embrace their sins. We are not bad entities. Your Heaven, however, is too strict.”

“Liar,” shouted Jaejoong. “We want humans to be happy. They do not need to sin to celebrate life. They need to follow the rules, procedures, and structures of Earth. They need to respect each other and most importantly, they need to love without conditions. That’s what life is about.”

“And what do you know about love?” asked Yunho with a smirk decorating his face. “You don’t know how to feel, Jaejoong. But I do.”

“Neither of you know what love truly is,” meddled Junsu, sighing afterward. “You both are entities. You have never been human, like me. Love is so complex, painful and at the same time, it’s wonderful. It makes you feel sad, it makes you feel angry but it also makes you feel like you have earned the world. It makes your soul happy and joyful. It has so many variants that no matter how many times you have come back and forth, you still won’t get it. It is out of your control but you still want to have it. It’s a sensation that won’t be understood by you.”

Yunho laughed at the soul but did not say a single word.

He was talking pure bullshit.

But he wasn’t here to talk about love or feelings in general. He came here for a deal that needed to be made and completed.

“Well, Yoochun wants to save you, so if you come back, your soul is mine,” said the demon while crossing his arms.

“False,” responded the angel. “If you want to come back and repent from your sins, both souls will be greeted in Heaven. All you need to do is believe and say yes.”

“The agreement was to come and find you, and I did,” persuaded Yunho. “It is my responsibility to take you to inhabit Hell. There is nothing you can do to save his soul.”

“I can!” he shouted, trying to defy the demon. He tried to reach Junsu’s arm but he couldn’t. He almost swore, having it learned from Yunho but he behaved. He was a high-ranked angel and he needed to act like one.

“See?” answered the demon with a laugh. “You can’t even touch him. How are you going to conquer his soul?”

Jaejoong closed his eyes, the images of the training with Yunho coming to his mind. The laughs, the readings, the first time he touched a heavenly sword and most importantly, the day the ex-angel personally told him he was going to train him. Those words always stuck to his mind and they never went away.

Along with his bright eyes.

The angel briefly felt the connection between the reckless soul and him. After a few seconds, he felt how he could completely touch him, taking his hand into his. Jaejoong opened his eyes back again and smiled to Junsu, giving him a wave of reassurance.

“Belief,” he said with a wince of pain. He felt the pain when one of the feathers on his wings fell and touched Limbo’s floor.

“Tainted,” murmured Yunho, watching how a quarter of Jaejoong’s left-wing was grey instead of white. It was expected. Jaejoong was an evil spirit warrior but not a limbo redeemer. They were two completely different things, but he was stubborn.

And it hurt him.

“I became tainted and I will get into more trouble because of this, but it is my mission to rescue you. I can deal with the punishment if that means I can save your soul,” admitted the angel with a smile on his face. “Just say yes.”

“I can’t leave Yoochun,” said Junsu with tears on his eyes. He was a mere soul between life and death, but he felt everything just as if he were on his human shell. “You can’t forgive a soul that has yet to come.”

“I can,” he responded. “I am an angel.”

“Just a warrior,” replied the demon. “You defend against evil spirits. You are no redeemer.”

“You were supposed to take Heavens’ wheels and yet you failed,” he snapped back and Yunho took three steps back.

That hurt him.

Junsu looked at both back and forth. He didn’t want to say anything, he just wanted to leave, and he knew exactly how. “When my day comes, I will decide. If I stood here, it is because I was confused and could not leave. If I wanted to take any side, or if any of you wanted me to take aside, it would have been decided already. It is not my job to say, but it is something you need to see on your own. Once a decision is made, everything is lost and there’s no way to take it back. He--” he signaled at Jaejoong. “Could lose everything but you--,” he changed the direction of his fingers to Yunho. “Have nothing to lose, having lost it all already.”

“You can’t condemn a soul when you still have purity in your wings and you can’t forgive a soul when you have a taint not related to me,” was all he could say before he felt a pull. “Oh, there it is… My shell is waking up.”

“So, I came here for nothing?” mocked the demon, not believing a word the reckless soul was saying.

“No, you came to love,” were Junsu’s final words before he disappeared into thin air, his soul going back to his body. He slowly opened his eyes, a crying Yoochun screaming for a doctor while not letting his hand go...

“Love?” he said, in disbelief at what happened. It made him chuckle to think he wasted all this effort for nothing.

“You… are not completely demon…” said Jaejoong in disbelief, feeling an indescribable emotion inside him. “Your wings… your wings are grey… They are not completely black...”

Yunho half-smiled. He knew the angel just noticed because he became tainted himself. If not, he would have continued to believe his wings were pitch black. But he was right, he was not a complete demon.

He was a Caden.

Cadens were demons that still have purity in their entities. They are not accepted by the Heavens, but they cannot come back as they are tainted with feelings, just like humans. They also cannot be completely accepted in Hell because they haven’t felt all emotions, especially envy. But they were great workers and that’s all they cared about. They did not have privileges like some others, but they weren’t completely rejected either.

They were just like the Limbo. They were half and half.

“Why were we never made aware of this?” whispered Jaejoong in absolute horror.

Where are the Heavens hiding things from them?

He winced again, another feather falling.

“Every time you doubt, you’ll feel a feather falling,” explained Yunho, his hands inside his pockets. “Please, don’t… It already happened when you were feeling emotions don't do it again..."

“Why?” he asked, the tears falling from his eyes. He did not know what these were, neither how they were created. He just knew it was hurting him. Not only the feathers but also his wavering faith.

“You shouldn’t care,” said the angel, pausing for a bit. “You are a demon.”

“A demon that loves you,” he said all of the sudden, freezing Jaejoong in his confession.

What?

Love?

“They would never say my sin,” he began to explain, a sad smile painting his face. “They are not allowed to say the sin in front of the one the sin was committed for.”

“W-what?” the angel was having a hard time understanding him.

He was more confused than before.

“I fell in love with you, Jaejoong,” he confessed for the first time. That’s why he laughed when Junsu said he didn’t understand love. That’s why he came running once he knew that soul was Jaejoong’s responsibility. That’s why he bickered all the way in Limbo. That’s why he followed him even though he could have gone on his own and reached Junsu easily without any problems. He didn’t want to condemn Junsu’s soul. In fact, he didn’t give a fuck about what happened to him.

All he wanted was Jaejoong.

But he knew it was out of his hands. The angel was exactly that, an angel. He was a half-demon that needed to stay, for “eternities” if necessary, until he could be a full demon. There was no other option for him.

“My sin was loving you,” he continued, watching as Jaejoong’s tears touched Limbo’s floor with a splash of light brightening the obscured place. “The moment you were created, I knew I fell. I hid it extremely well and I always thought it was a mere influence. You were the most beautiful angel that He had created and I was perplexed. For eternities, I thought it was that way until you continued to step forward.”

“I tried to run,” he explained, feeling his tears making their appearance. “I tried to step away from you, as much as I could, to prevent training you. I wished I could have been a Seraph when you arrived, but I wasn’t meeting their expectations. So, trying to fight this feeling, I tried to fight you by training you… that became my second sin.”

“My third and final sin was deciding to become a fallen angel. I wanted to retain my wings, but I wasn’t able in the Heavens as I loved you… It was selfish… But I wanted my wings… No matter if they were tainted, I kept them, just like I kept this love for you…”

Jaejoong gasped.

“You are beautiful in every way, shape, and form,” said the demon, a sigh coming out from his mouth. “And I love you. Everything I did while I was here was to see you one last time. I never asked for more. I just…” he gulped, the first tear falling from his eyes. “I just wanted to see you.”

“But I’m letting you go, Jaejoong,” he admitted, more tears caressing his cheeks. “He was right. Junsu was right. I can’t condemn a soul just like I can’t condemn you. Being a Caden was my own decision and I don’t regret it. I’ve seen you again. And for me, that’s enough…”

“Your existence itself is enough.”

Jaejoong started crying, the feathers falling more and more. He felt his knees lose their strength and he touched the floor, his light dimming as more tears fell down.

It was hard to understand. It was difficult to comprehend. But that soul was right. Junsu’s soul was right.

He was tainted from the beginning.

Ever since his creation, he was doomed to fall but he fought fiercely.

His devotion was bigger than anything. Bigger than him.

He felt Yunho coming closer to him, just like he did that very first time. He couldn't comprehend why he was so confused, why he was suddenly feeling just like those humans his subordinates watched every day but feeling the demon closer to him woke him up. The angel suddenly felt mesmerized by something deeper than his shadows.

His angelic soul.

For him, it was as pure as it could be. He was the definition of love itself and he felt the tears falling again.

He was damned.

Jaejoong felt the demon reaching for his waist, finally breaking the wall between them and the angel closed his eyes, their foreheads touching each other.

Unbelievably... he felt complete.

Suddenly, the connection between them broke as there was a glass-beamed wall dividing both of them, separating them completely. Jaejoong was on the lighter side while Yunho was surrounded by shadows. The Authority was smiling, the tears covering his face. He was a high-end angel, but there he was, loving a demon. He loved Yunho with everything in him, but it was not fair.

He couldn’t betray the skies, yet the other did it for him.

Why did he learn to love? Why did they send him to Limbo to fight against his former general? He had so many questions, but he knew no answers would be given to him. After all, he followed orders. He was in no position to rebel, neither did he want to. He was created for a purpose and no matter how much he yearned, he would obey.

He would remain in Heaven.

“You might become a Caden too, Jae,” he heard Yunho calling his name, but he kept his usual mien. There was no point in showing him how much he was hurting. Although the Greatest knew everything and Yunho was right. He might be damned and sent to Cadenstella, but he would leave it up to them.

And he would accept it, just like any other punishment they saw fit for him. It was his fault for falling in love. Not theirs, but strictly his.

Angels loved, but they didn’t fall in love. That was the difference.

He loved Yunho like humans loved each other and that was his biggest sin.

“If you do, I’ll ask for you,” Yunho said, hearing his soul shattering into pieces. Demons were completely different for angels. They had every single feeling a human had but to an extent. They were supposed to take advantage of it, that’s why they understood the seven sins. He was the greatest collector of souls, taking for granted the desperation of those around him.

But he knew that his greatest sorrow was shaped in the angel dressed as a warrior.

“Okay,” was all he said, knowing two entities were beside him. They smelt like deception covered in punishment, but he deserved it.

Love was not supposed to be in his form. Love was not supposed to be painful. Love was simply supposed to be love.

“I love you,” the angel admitted aloud for the first time, the tears finally falling. He knew his human form was slowly disappearing and his light was succumbing.

This is how they felt. This is how humans felt when a loved one departed. This is how they cried and begged for the pain to be taken away.

He suddenly felt like doing it too.

“Jae…” he said, taken aback at the confession. He knew that would cost serious consequences and he just hoped, for once in his unlimited lifetime, to have him.

All he wanted was Jaejoong.

“I love you too,” Yunho responded, watching the angel figure disappear completely and the wall that covered them, fading away with its owner.

The demon felt the tears escaping, his insides churning in anger. He was pissed, he was upset at his former boss. Why did angels have to live such a cruel fate? What was so bad about loving another? Didn’t he create a love for that damned reason? Wasn’t he supposed to be lenient and understanding? But he wasn’t.

He fucking hated Him. No matter how much he fought against it, he hated Him.

“Yunho,” he heard his companion calling him, her hand on top of his shoulder. “There’s nothing you can do,” said Kana, trying to cheer him up. “You fell in love with him. You sinned many of us and here we are. We don’t regret coming, but he is very upright. He won’t betray him as we did.”

“And that’s what breaks me the most,” answered Yunho, the shadows consuming him. “That he is willing to take the stupid lesson, but he won’t admit it himself!” he screamed, the darkness adding to the atmosphere.

“You were a former angel, a high-ranked one,” she began to explain, the shadows following her as she walked around him. “You know it’s better to deny than to accept.”

“I loved him ever since I laid my eyes on him,” he said, brand new tears appearing. “I loved him enough to condemn myself. I lost my wings, my position, I lost everything because I loved him…”

“But it’s not his fault...or is it?” she said, suddenly stopping, her red eyes looking directly at him. “Your wings were always mixed and you know why? Because you were born for betrayal. Your wings might have been the greatest over there, but they always had a tint of darkness. That’s why, even though you always defy, they have a tint of light over here. You always believed in that love, Yunho. But he is gone. You are not getting him back.”

And Yunho sobbed, the shades leaving with Kana.

His knees hit the floor, his cries were heard in the doom.

She was right, he was not getting him back.

But that didn’t mean he loved him any less.

+++

Eternities have passed, but there was Yunho, standing on a bridge. Thousands of people walked, laughed and talked to each other. It happened every day, every night. He didn’t like it, but he didn’t dislike it either. It was just a weird feeling of comfort. He was used to it. After all, he was created to be around them without any suspicion.

Yunho sighed, his eyes focused on the horizon. He should be used to the wonders of the world, but when you have an unlimited lifetime, it was easy to get bored or be amazed. He chose to be the latter. That way, his soul fought to exist, since it died the same day Jaejoong left for the skies to never return.

And Yoochun’s soul was nowhere to be found, just like Junsu’s. But he was sure that those two were reincarnated somewhere. After all, souls were energy and humans had that ability. Unlike demons and angels, they could be on Earth if it existed, but in different shells. Demons, just like him, either ceased to exist or remained forever. Same with angels. There weren’t a lot of differences between them.

Just one.

Love.

Yunho felt tears trying to burn their way forward, but he held them back well. There was no use in remembering or to continue his sorrow. He was not there anyway.

Jaejoong wasn’t there anymore.

“It’s a beautiful sunset,” he heard a certain person say and he arched an eyebrow. He was sure he was hidden, or maybe the pain brought his human form back. He wasn’t sure, but he wasn’t going to say anything anyway.

A human would never understand.

“But like anything beautiful, it has its end,” was his last sentence, the stranger’s eyes on top of his face.

“Everything ends eventually,” he answered back, looking back at him and standing in shock.

What?

“I know,” he replied, not noticing the drastic change in the older male.

“Jaejoong?” Yunho called him, his soul crying at the name he hasn’t mentioned in millenniums.

“Oh, how did you know my name?” he answered, a bit taken aback.

But Yunho could not respond. All of a sudden, he simply saw the human’s soul in front of him.

The angel.

It was Jaejoong, his angel.

_‘I’m back,’_ he muttered, reaching Yunho’s face with his faint hands. He no longer had the wings or the armor that distinguished him. But his expression, his mannerism, and that pure soul was everything he needed to know it was him.

His long-lost love.

_‘It took me millenniums, but here I am,’_ he kept hearing, the tears falling from Yunho’s face. _‘This body doesn’t recognize you, but my soul does. I don’t have restrictions. I complied, Yun. Guide me. I’m yours.’_

Yunho began to sob, suddenly hugging the human in front of him. Jaejoong seemed confused, but he did not feel weird or anything.

He felt… _free._

_‘I love you,’_ his soul said, his body closing his eyes.

“I love you too…” he whispered, the tears falling and touching his delicate skin.

_‘8 millenniums later and my soul is still yours… as it will always be. Always, Yunho. Always.’_


End file.
